


Reaching through

by tiffanytheweirdo



Category: NCIS
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Low-Key Touch-Starved Ellie Bishop, Nick to the Rescue, Panic Attacks, Soft Nick Torres
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-16
Updated: 2020-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:40:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23167900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tiffanytheweirdo/pseuds/tiffanytheweirdo
Summary: Ellie's having a panic attack out of no reason and the only thing that can help her is the touch of Nick. TW for panic attack.
Relationships: Ellie Bishop/Nick Torres
Comments: 6
Kudos: 69





	Reaching through

**Author's Note:**

> This is based on my personal experience, something happened a little more than half a year ago. The only difference is I don't have a Nick in my life like Ellie, so lucky her haha

It started out without any obvious triggers. It just started, the fear, the panic, the suffocating feeling, all came rushing.  
Tears clouding her vision, Ellie trips over the small metal basket on her shower floor when she's getting out of the shower hastily.  
"Fuck" By the pain Ellie's feeling, the back of her foot is going to bruise tomorrow. But that is her least concern right now. Ellie manages to wrap a towel around herself before sinking down to the cold tile of her bathroom floor.  
Panic attacks aren't something foreign to Ellie but she hasn't had one in a long long time. Attempting one of those breathing exercises, Ellie struggles to get calm herself just enough to stand up on her shaky legs and get dressed.  
And this calmness only holds until Ellie collapses onto her bed, curling tight into a fetal position. With the feeling of her airway closing up again, only more intense this time, she blindly reaches for her phone. She needs help.

Nick is on his way back to their shared apartment when he receives Ellie's text. The text which consist of only one word -- Help.  
Nick frowns at the message and calls Ellie immediately, not sure about what's happening but he's definitely worried.  
"Ellie? What's wrong?" Nick asks when Ellie picks up the phone.  
"Nick--" Ellie manages to gasps out while hyperventilating.  
"I'm here, babe, I need you to try calming down" And Nick recognizes that panicky tone of Ellie and knows right away she's having a panic attack.  
"I can't--"  
"Yes you can, I'm on the way home okay? Just hang in there" Nick reassures Ellie, picking up his pace.  
"Nick-- I--"  
"Shhhh. Try deep breaths for me" Nick really wishes that he can teleport back home now. He takes a deep breath himself, willing Ellie to copy him and also pushing down his own rising panic. Ellie needs him.  
Ellie sucks in some shuddering breathes but it still feels like there's no oxygen going in. She pulls at the collar of her sleep shirt, trying to relieve the tightness around her throat. She is starting to feel lightheaded, like she's drowning. Nick's voice through the phone is getting farther away, like she's falling into a deep dark pit.  
"Help me Nick" Ellie chokes out, pleading weakly.  
"I'm almost there baby, you're okay. Just try to breathe in on 4 and out on another 4" Nick practically started running at this point, needing to be by Ellie's side as soon as possible.  
Nick continues with the breathing instruction for Ellie, slightly relieved when he hears Ellie's breathing falls back to a slightly slower pattern.  
Ellie's body relaxes a bit when her breathing calms a fraction with Nick guiding her through. At least she feels less suffocated right now then five minutes ago.  
"I'm so proud of you. I'm coming up so I need to hang up for now. Will you be okay?" Nick asks, entering the apartment building.  
"Yeah, just... hurry" Ellie response weakly, trying to keep herself away from getting all worked up again.

A few minutes later, Ellie hears the sound of keys and the door opening. She tenses up for a moment until she hears Nick's familiar footsteps approaching the bedroom.  
"Hey babe" Nick greets softly.  
"Nick..." Ellie is still breathing heavily, tears never stopped rolling down her face.  
"Shhhh I'm here now. Deep breaths Ellie, deep breaths" Nick crosses the room with three strides and sits down beside Ellie on the bed, hand going to the small of her back instinctively.

Ellie has a thing with touch. Growing up, her mother was a hugger. And having three older brothers means forehead kisses when she's upset and pats on the head when she accomplished something. Touching was a huge way to convey love and feelings in the Bishop household. Until Ellie moved out after getting into college and to DC for her NSA and NCIS jobs. She can only get the touch only now and then when she returns home for holidays and maybe occasionally from the team. But that's not enough, even when she's in her previous relationships.  
Then Nick came along into her life. She then realized how touch-starved she was, with all the small and gentle touches Nick would give her.  
Protective hand on the small of her back or forearm out in the field, arm causally draped over her shoulder when they went for lunch or dinner together, small kisses on her cheeks or forehead after they got together, cuddles on the couch when they're watching movies and the way he held her 

The warmth of Nick's palm steeps through the thin shirt onto Ellie's skin while he draws small circles there. Taking in a slower breath, Ellie finally feels the invisible grip on her throat loosen up.  
Nick's heart finally drops back to where it should be when he feels Ellie uncurls herself a little with much steadier breathing.  
"All better?" He asks, the other hand going up to wipe the tears away from Ellie's cheek.  
Ellie nods, her throat raw with all the crying and gasping.  
"Good. Focus on your breathing, I'm gonna get you some water" Nick leans down and kisses Ellie's forehead gently before pulling away.  
Ellie whimpers at the loss of Nick's touch, closing her eyes to focus on her breathing as told.  
Before she knows it, Nick is back by her side again, smoothly positing them so Ellie is curled up on his lap with him leaning against the headboard.  
"Here, drink up" Nick helps Ellie with the bottle of water, knowing her hands are still way too shaky to do it on her own.  
"Thanks" Ellie whispers after gulping down half the bottle.  
"Anything for ya. You gave me quite a scare"  
"Sorry" Ellie mutters, eyes dropping close.  
"Shush, it's okay. I got you now"  
With her body's reaction to the trauma kicking in, Ellie shivers and tucks herself closer to Nick.  
Nick knows Ellie tends to get cold after an episode like this. Keep one hand on Ellie's back protectively, Nick reaches down to pull the blanket up to have it wrapped around Ellie.  
"You wanna talk about what happened?" Nick prompts softly, still not know what set his girl off.  
Ellie shakes her head, not really able comprehend Nick's words right now with her hazy mind.  
"It's okay. We'll talk tomorrow"  
"I love you" Ellie whispers, burying her head in the crock of Nick's neck, taking in all the warmth she can get.  
"I love you too. Rest, everything's okay now" Nick tightens his arm around Ellie, stroking her hair with another, and drops a kiss onto the top of her head.

And yes, everything is okay now because Nick is here. He has reached through Ellie's wind whirl of a mind, and gotten hold of her, grounding her with the simplest touch of all.


End file.
